I think I’m in a funk. I’ll call it a ‘mommy funk’ because that sounds much nicer than ‘post pardom depression’. And I don’t really feel depressed, lately (meaning the last 2 days) I’ve been working out which puts me in a great mood. Sam is crawling and trying to walk which makes her super fun to play with. She does this new thing where she scrunches up her nose and snorts at me, I absolutely crack up! But somehow even though life is better than good there are times of the day where the house it quiet, it’s just me and I get a bit bummed.
I know this is completely normal, I’ve heard it from so many moms, books and blogs but I still feel this urge to try and fix it. P thinks I need more mommy friends and activities. I think he might be right. I have a couple of really great friends here who also have babies but coordinating schedules can be tough, and a best friend in Florida that I try and chat with when we both happen to be sans kids at the same time, but still the majority of my week is the same routine.
Wake up and do it again…all week long. Funk.
So I’m looking into mom’s groups. My bff in Florida is a part of MOMS International, she’s constantly running off to a craft party, stroller walking, storytime or trip to the zoo with her mom’s group. It’s sounded wonderful so I contacted the group to find my local chapter. Just my luck, the lady wrote me back yesterday to say that my area is inactive but I’m more than welcome to start up a new chapter. Well that’s just peachy, I have to start up a new chapter when the whole problem is I don’t know many people here?
I went to the OB/GYN yesterday for a routine pap. I actually love dr’s appts because for the 20 min drive there and back I get to crank up the music, open the sunroof and pretend to be my previously fabulous young self, not to mention getting to sit and read People magazine in the waiting room without someone ripping out the pages is downright delish! Anyway, posted in the waiting room is a flyer for MyMarylandMommies. I’m going to look into it and see if I have an ‘active’ chapter.
Maybe it’s the combination of being a stay-at-home mom, living away from family and having a tendency of being a homebody anyway that’s gotten me here. Wish me luck, I gotta find something before I either get my credit card taken away for shopping away my blues or just melt away into mommyzombieland.
Natasha,
We all go through it better then others. I see myself feeling the same ways more times then not, a lot of my friends aren’t even married and aren’t even considering having kids. I find my self getting Kristian in this wonderful wagon and Sienna and going for long walks around the neighborhood and the lakes. I think that you are overwhelmed and that you need Natasha time, take some time out of the day to your self and it will make you feel a lot better. Since you like to shop so much you may want to get a part-time job or volunteer so you can interact with others.
John always tells me that I need to find friends as well and we have lived in the same area for years time coordination and activites are hard to come by. If you are interested I am willing to have a play date Kristian is a little bit older but he is great fun. We live over at the lakelands so there is plenty to do.
Tell me about it! And then adding insult to injury, AMC hasn’t been all that great since Greenlee died…geeze!
At least your husband will take care of the baby so that you can cook and clean! Mine works 12-13 hour days so when he gets home, he just wants to sit on the couch and do nothing… The biggest help for me is dropping the baby off at day care 2 days a week so that I can have 1 day to clean and grocery shop and then 1 day to do what ever I want! I originally thought I was being a bad mom by wanting to use day care but my son really loves it there. He gets to socialize and interact with other kids. Plus going part time to day care isn’t all that expensive.
Natasha, you are a great mom and the feelings you are having are very normal. It sounds like you need to set aside some “me” time a couple times a week either with a friend or two or just by yourself. I work full time so I can’t really relate but when I was on maternity leave, I secretly wanted to go back to work to have some adult conversation, get dressed up and use my brain! I know that’s terrible to say, but that’s how I felt. It’s a lot of work to stay at home and is very often taken for granted by others. People think it’s easy, but they’re wrong. It takes a good person to leave their career behind to raise their children. Now that it’s getting warmer out, you and Sam will be able to get outside more and maybe that will help a little. I definitely agree with Allyson that maybe volunteering some where or a pt job might be good as well. If that’s not an option, then just tell P that you need “me” time and just plan it. Moms forget to take care of themselves, because we are always worried about everyone else! But a night out or a couple of hours away to shop, have lunch with a friend or whatever it may be help, and then you come back refreshed. Hang in there!
I wish I was able to stay at while I’m pregnant. I know its incredibly hard for you but do you have family come and visit often? Maybe you should ask your folks about it.
Definitely find a play group and some moms to bond with. I got into a book club and with some other friends, that is a great support system
I would love to be part of a mommy’s group with you, but I live in NoVA. 🙁
I am not a Mom, I am a Nanny so I tend to feel like a stay at home mom/housewife when I return home. I felt the EXACT same way last week. My day is so repetative and I couldnt figure out what was missing. I now have a new hobby- Fishing. I enjoy it soooo much that I am not longer in a rut. Maybe you just need a new hobby. I would sew and do crafts just as you do, but maybe you need something you have never done before.
I just saw your blog and i love it. i know exactly how you feel; I am from Brazil and moved here 5 years ago, so i had no friends; When i had my adorable 3 year old (Gabriella) i really wanted some mommy friends. Well i have been part of the same group for almost 3 years now and they are great. We have moms night out (Nothing crazy; usually Bonefish, Red Rock Canyon, movies. We have a lot of fun! And the kids love each other. We even go to the gym together! Which is great because Sport and Health at the Rio has a great kids club, so after working out we go to starbucks to chat a little. Anyways, if you are still looking for a group, send me an email and i will tell you more about it. Sorry for the long post! (janabacellar@hotmail.com)